"the struggle" with infertility

I've been debating how I want to present this. I have an an annuncement that's about a week old. After a monday night trip to the movies to see Cinderella, my wife came downstairs to show me a positive pregnancy test. It shouldn't be a surprise. We knew it would happen eventually. I was just hoping it wouldn't happen so soon. I want to direct my attention towards those who struggle with infertility and admit something.

Lately  I've been noticing alot of infertility couples in the news. Wether it's the quadruplit couple who recently had their babies, the blog I follow, or the recent Deseret News article I read last week one thing they all have in common. "The struggle". It's in every news blog or Facebook post. The story of how the couple "struggled" to have a kid.  Wether it was financial  emotional physical Or spiritual  they do struggle. I have never struggled to have children but would it be harsh to say I wonder what it would be like?

You know those surveys that started on the blog world and eventually ended up on Facebook? The ones where you bold or underline the things you have accomplished? I want to do one too. If you know a "struggling" couple, meaning, struggling with infertility, or are that couple, think about this list and what you can add to it or what you have accomplished. I also want to add this is something you have done as a couple. Also if you lived in a certain  area like Hawaii or Alaska and it says something like "have you ever traveled to(blank)" It doesn't count.
So, have you....

Been on a cruise.
(Still waiting)

Visited New York

Had a lobster dinner

Been to Paris

Random weekend getaway
( that includes airplane
travel to get there)

Won a trip

Been to Hawaii

Disneyland

Disney world

Vegas

Been on church assistance

Cancun

Stayed at a Beach house

Had your mortgage or rent paid by a church

Stayed at an oceanside hotel

Stayed at a luxury suite. (Comparable to the aniversery inn)

Stayed at an all inclusive resort.

Had an entire cabin to yourselves

Italy

Rome

Jamaica

Bahamas

Been on Food stamps

I think I'm just going to leave it at that.
Most of you married "struggling"  couples may look at that list and notice that while your "struggling" your  getting  alot done on your bucket list. FYI Anything bolded above has been done with my kids.
My point is this. It goes both ways. Either you struggle to have kids and while you're "struggling" , you probably have some pretty awesome vacations and accomplish a lot or you have kids barely get by with just enough money. Have no money for vacations and even if you did finding someone you trust to take care of them for a length of time You constantly worry  about them. At least I do. We both "STRUGGLE"

I don't mean to tell you this next story to scare you its just one reason why I find it hard to go on a getaway with just my wife and I. I once stumbled upon a blog about a young maried couple.  About a year after they had their first kid they decided to get away. While they were gone the parents of the Husband got into a car accident killing all 3 including their little girl. I wish I had never read that but that haunts me to this day. It's  one of the reasons I'm hesitant to get away. That and debt.

Maybe some of you are wondering  why I put assistance programs up there. If your bolding cancun Disneyland and and assistance program(s), that doesn't make sense. I also put them up there because alot of young married couples with kids are on those assistance programs. This still confuses me. I was taught (and we all were taught in the church ) that we should  stay away from government and church assistance programs and become self reliant then when you get married they tell you to go and multiply and replenish the earth, You do, then end up on some type of welfare. What? So again even if you have kids, if you mark off Hawaii and food stamps. Yeah. That makes alot of sense.

So I think I will leave it at that. I have a little  bit more to say on my personal feelings about having another baby but I am not ready nor in the right mood to share them. Have a great Monday everyone.